It's Been A While

I just realized that it's been quite a while since I posted an entry. I think about it, and tell myself that I really should sit down and write something, but I then I notice that I am too busy, or too tired, or just don't feel like it, or that I REALLY need to beat the next level of "Candy Crush". "I'll get to it later", I say to myself. I don't, though. However, now that it's summer, and I supposedly have all of this time on my hands, there is no reason for me not to be doing some writing. After all, I tell myself, that were I not a teacher, I would like to be a writer. Also, and this is just an aside, I realize that I think like a writer. When someone says something to me, or when my grandchildren do something adorable, or my husband does something annoying, I find that I am framing the event as if I were going to write about it. There are lots of stories that I would like to tell, and someday, I will tell the very important ones that impact my life. For now, though, I will just tell the ones that I am thinking about at the moment. Stay tuned.

The Problem With Education

Teachers are getting quite a bad rap these days. Everybody seems to know that any time children don't do well in school, it is the fault of the teacher, and it is because teachers make too much money, have too much time off, and have little to do when they are at work. I must admit, that even within the ranks of teachers, there is some of that backbiting. High school teachers insist that elementary schools are just places where babysitting takes place, and elementary teachers insist that high school personnel have little to do except to prepare for one class a day, and teach it over and over again. Middle schools? That's just where kids hang out once they've gotten through those lower grades, and aren't ready for high school yet. I have some ideas about education, though. Teachers have long known that while we are important in the education spectrum, the most critical learning takes place at home. I'm not suggesting that parents become educators and follow the curriculum. No. The lessons children need to learn consist of the following: taking school and education seriously. My daughter pointed out to me the other day that the Top 10 students in our local school district, as well as the Top 10 students in a neighboring school district all came from 2-parent homes. In each and every instance, the children's parents were referred to as Him and Her Blankenspot. Every single one of the 20 top students in 2 neighboring districts have parents who are married to each other and live in the same home in which the child resides. I realize that this is an anomoly, and that there are many circumstances that arise in which this is not possible. But what a level of commitment that shows.

A Baylee Story

Here's one of the many reasons I love my granddaughter, Baylee. First, I need to say that she is truly a descendant of feisty female relatives, as anybody who knows us can attest to. Yesterday, she proved the point in a mighty fashion.

Adrianne and the kids were over when Kerri, Mike and Benjamin were here. As was my mother. For dinner, pizza and wings were the menu, as requested by the transplanted Maryland folks, and because our living room is small, we got the kids' little table out. Baylee was bringing out one of the little folding chairs, and my mother told her to let her help. Baylee informed Nana (politely) that she didn't need help, and could do it herself. This annoyed Nana, who waggled her finger at Baylee, and told her not to get snippy with her. So Baylee refolded the chair, carried it back into the other room, and told Nana that she could bring the chair out herself. This did NOT please my mother, who refused to do so, thus proving Baylee's point.

Judging Others

I have a very short-lived obsession these days. Fortunately, I think I’m getting over it, because I’m pretty sure I wouldn’t be able to stand myself if I didn’t.
The obsession is with judge shows, “Judge Judy” and the like, where (stupid) people bring their (petty) problems out into the open, so that (real?) judges can react with varying amounts of humor. Almost always, the judge finds for the person who has been the least wronged, because, I’m assuming, there is some common sense involved.
I wonder if this is what might be contributing to wrongness in our society. In just the past few days, I’ve seen a man suing his nephew for money owed, a woman suing a man for money owed, a woman suing another woman for money owed, etc. It seems that nobody has the sense to sign contracts, read contracts, keep track of the amount owed, or realize that, “Hey! I owe somebody money. I should probably pay it so the sheriffs don’t come to my workplace and embarrass me. Then, I might have to go on TV and prove, in front of millions of people, that I really am an idiot, and that I didn’t pay my uncle the money I owe him.”
On most of these shows, the people who show up to be judged are ignorant. For example, they call the judge, “Judy”, or “Alex”, instead of “Your Honor”. Also, they talk while the judge is talking, talk while the other ignorant person is talking, use poor grammar, and bring up issues that have nothing to do with the present concern.
Here’s why I wonder about the microcosm of society: So often, people are hesitant to take the blame for things they have done wrong. So often, people say one thing, and then do something completely antithetical to what they claimed. So often, to get ahead, people point out what others have or haven’t done, and most important of all, people refuse to use even a modicum of common sense.
I am so glad I am over this obsession.

Our House

Our house is not much to look at. It's small, has a relatively inefficient heating system, sits pretty close to a main road, and could use a fair amount of work. The plumbing leaks, the layout is crud, and well, it's just a house. One bathroom. Small, sloping yard. No pool. A detached garage with huge holes in the roof. Right now, the bathroom is in such a sorry state that we decided not to invite friends over for New Year's Eve. We don’t travel much, partly because we’re homebodies, and partly because it’s expensive and time-consuming. We'll never be wealthy, money-wise, but we have enough to live on.

We're lucky, though. We're warm (though sometimes a sweatshirt is in order). We're dry, thanks to the new roof. We're close to stores, close to our jobs, and since we're not too fussy, it's easy to maintain.

The other night, when I couldn't sleep, I wandered around the house. The Christmas lights were still on, so it looked pretty, and everywhere I went, there was a cat snoozing on some surface or other. It wasn't a cold night, so I wasn't shivering, and as I looked out the front window, I could see the slumbering town in which we successfully raised our 3 daughters. I realized how fortunate we are, probably more so than many other people. We'll never be wealthy, money-wise, but we have enough to live on. Our daughters have been successfully launched on the world, and are doing their parts, with the help of wonderful spouses, to do the same with their children. We have family we adore, jobs we enjoy, friends we love, a church filled with awesome folks, and pets to drive us crazy. We can afford to eat decently, dress decently, enjoy time with others and even help those less fortunate than we are.

Life is truly what you make of it. Blessings to all.

Teacher Bashing

There’s a lot of teacher bashing going on these days. People complain about how much money we make, how much time we have off, how little time we actually spend in the classroom, etc., etc., etc. I understand these perceptions to a point. If you’re not a teacher, or married to one, or maybe a parent or a child of one, you may not know about the intense amount of preparation that goes into becoming a teacher. You may not know that by the time you become a permanently certified teacher, you have logged thousands of hours of college classes, and thousands of dollars of your own money. That you have studied, and researched, and written papers, and met with professors, and spent many weeks in a number of classrooms to help prepare you for the day you stand in front of a group of children and welcome them into your life for the next 10 months.

But I’m not here to talk about that. I’m here to talk about something that most teachers are very good at, and which often annoys, and sometimes angers parents. Actually, it’s something that often annoys relatives of teachers as well. I’m here to talk about common sense, and making connections. Some years ago, when my oldest daughter was in 5th grade, she played the flute. She was a good musician, and playing the instrument came pretty easily and naturally to her. With a minimum of extreme effort, she played first flute in elementary school, even sitting in the first chair for quite a time. When she arrived home from her first day at middle school, she was in quite a snit; it seems she had had to audition for her new music teacher, and after the audition, she was told that she would definitely not be sitting in the first chair. Her practicing over the summer had consisted of a quick rehearsal for a piece she would play in church, and the playing of said piece in church.

“Your teacher has a Master’s degree in music education”, I said to her. “Did you think she wouldn’t notice that you didn’t play over the summer?”

Here’s what I mean by making connections: When your child seems tired and unable to concentrate, it is quite likely that I am going to assume that he isn’t getting to bed at a reasonable hour on a regular basis. When all she wants to talk about is what level she reached on some video game that I’ve never heard of, but her homework isn’t done, I’m going to guess that the time spent on video games might be better spent on homework. When your child refuses to follow simple directions in school, I am going to think that it’s quite possible that you have trouble with him at home, as well. If you don’t have a reasonably amicable relationship with your child’s other parent, please don’t blame me when you don’t get matching information from your child or the school. When your child has to be reminded of simple manners, like covering her nose and mouth when she coughs and sneezes, saying, “please, thank you, and excuse me”, or waiting his turn to speak, I am going to imagine that you are not as attentive to those things at home as you could be. If you have asked me for, and I have given you advice about homework or discipline problems, please at least try them before you come back complaining to me that you can’t control your child. If you haven’t tried them, have the courtesy to tell me so. I can’t work magic.

When we make a suggestion about whom your child is hanging around with, and suggest that he might make a better choice, please don’t get angry with me. We see what happens to “good” children who hang around with the wrong crowd. Many of us have been teaching long enough, have been parents long enough, or have lived in this town long enough to see these things. Sometimes, all 3 of these things come into play.

I am happy to help your child with weaknesses she may have in reading or math, but I need you to do so at home as well. When I send home books for your child to read, or math work for him to do, it is helpful if you follow up on what I have given you. And please don’t think I have sympathy for your comment of, “I just can’t get her to listen to me” or “I just can’t get him to go to school”. She’s 9. Or he’s 11. Or whatever. If you haven’t disciplined him for the first 5 or 9 or 15 years of his life, starting now is going to be futile.

We’re not the bad guys. We care about your child a great deal, and anybody who thinks that we went through all of the energy, education, and money spent to continue in a job we don’t love, isn’t thinking too clearly. If we suggest that you might consider having your child participate in fewer activities because she is having difficulty with her studies, please take a moment to at least consider it. If you decide to keep him in all of the activities that he is in, then you need to understand that the amount of time we have available to us to help remediate your child are going to be limited.

I’m not saying we’re perfect, and I’m not saying we don’t make mistakes. I know that there are often extenuating circumstances, but for the most part, it is clear that things are pretty much what they seem. That’s what I mean by connections.

The Geese

The geese are flying south. When I took the dog out this morning, I watched several batches of geese flying south. I’m not sure if this is their real trip, or if it is a practice, but for the sake of one small group, I hope it’s practice.

First, a group of about 20 went over my head, in a seemingly professional manner, one at the head honking directions, the others in perfect formation afterward. A few seconds later, a smaller group followed, only about 6 of them, but also behaving appropriately. Shortly afterward, another large group went on. It should be noted that all of these groups were traveling in a southwest direction.

“Happy trails”, I said to them all. “Travel safely”.

A few moments later, a squawky group of travelers passed overhead. There must have been some disagreement occurring, because a) they were extremely noisy, and b) while they were going south, it was much more southeast than southwest, so maybe their vacation home is in Florida, say, instead of Texas. Who knows?

Geese, wherever you’re going, have a safe trip, enjoy your vacation, and come back in the spring.